A first for me: making the Guinness Book of World Records... At the Challenge 08 conference at which I spoke last week, we set an official Guinness record: LARGEST KAZOO BAND EVER... WITH OVER 5200 PEOPLE PLAYING 'AMAZING GRACE' ON THE KAZOO FOR 4 MINUTES STRAIGHT. I even got to help lead it.
Click here to get a peep.
A proud moment. I'm compiling it in a file for "things I hope my daughters will be proud of me for."
So, yesterday I turned 35... as one of my friends told me, "You are now in a whole new age bracket" (that's not true, most age brackets I've seen are "18-35," so I'm still "young"); and another told me, "Hey, do you realize your life is officially half over?" No, I hadn't. Thanks. My wife took me out to Angus Barn for a truly sinful dinner... as I considered whether or not to get dessert, she told me, and I quote, "No, have the extra dessert. You can eat whatever you want now. You're 35 now so no one finds you attractive anymore anyway." (Oh, and thank you facebook community, to all of you who wrote happy birthday on my wall... facebook has created a whole new world, hasn't it?)
As I was spending time with God early yesterday morning, I began to reflect on the first half of my life... I wasn't doing this intentionally it was just that thing where your mind wanders while you pray sometimes... and I thought about the fact that when the next 35 years is over I will most likely be standing before God to give an account of my life. I was suddenly overcome with a strong sense of how so much of my first 35 years have been lived selfishly--with me as my primary concern. (I know that many of you think that going into the ministry means you automatically live for others and for God, but you very quickly find ways to masquerade serving yourself as benefiting others.) As I look back on my life, I can't tell a lot of difference between living for myself and truly living for the Kingdom of God, and was able to see that most of my life has been dominated by a preoccupation with my own interests. I was overwhelmed with a sense of regret. It caused me to do a few things:
I was also overwhelmed with a sense of gratefulness at the life God has given me. I have an incredible wife who loves me and serves me and gets prettier with each year. She always listens to me, and really tries to understand me. She is my companion and best friend, and she loves to make me happy. I have 3 healthy, beautiful children who make every day a humorous adventure. I have good friends who really care about me. I serve with the greatest people on earth and I love my job. My parents and my parents-in-law are all still alive, and love Jesus and stand as a spiritual covering above my family.
I have 2 conflicting emotions as I think about the next 35 years. The first is a sense of unbridled optimism about the opportunities ahead for our work at the Summit. We have so many things ahead of us... people to win to Jesus, congregations to plant, leaders to train. I can't wait to see what each day brings.
The other is a sense of overwhelming gloom... when I think about the massive numbers of people in RDU alone who don't really know Jesus and who will spend eternity apart from Him I start feeling helpless... and then the 1/3 of the world who has never had the first witness to Jesus... I feel like no matter how much we accomplish, it will only be a drop in bucket. Sometimes this sense of unbridled optimism will be followed immediately by a helpless-feeling depression. I feel like an ant who's been charged with removing all the water from the ocean one molecule at a time.
All I can do is give all I have to God, my five loaves and two fishes, and ask Him to do more with it than I ever thought possible. And I can pray that God will bless the work of Gospel-loving people all over the world so that together, we can see His Kingdom come and see His salvation fill the earth.
"Lord, so teach us to number our days that we may apply our hearts to learn wisdom." Psalm 90:12
Quick note: We are on week 6 of our 7.5 part Song of Solomon "Exposed" Series. This week: FIGHTING. The title is, "I Love You and I Hate You." Conflict is a staple of marriage... really of any relationship.
Conflict is not the problem. It's how we handle conflict. Good couples are not couples that don't fight; they are couples that fight well. Jesus can teach us to fight well. (There's a title you probably won't ever hear... "Jesus can teach you how to really fight.") Hope to see you Sunday to talk about it...
Here's some quotes I've come upon recently (in this month's Christianity Today)that were especially meaningful to being a Dad... of all the hats I wear, this is by far my favorite. I am convinced that fathering is the greatest thing I am doing for the cause of Gospel.
It is much easier to become a father than to be one. Kent Nerburn, Letters to My Son: Reflections on Becoming a Man
I Confess to thee that I am not worthy to rock the little babe or wash its diapers, or to be entrusted with the care of the child and its mother . . . O how gladly will I do so, though the duties should be even more insignificant and despised. Neither frost nor heat, neither drudgery nor labor, will distress or dissuade me, for I am certain that it is thus pleasing in his sight. Martin Luther, Luther’s Works
A Full Night’s Sleep, time to oneself, the freedom to come and go as one
pleases – all this must be given up . . . Huge chunks of life are laid down at the behest of infants. And then, later, parents must let go. Elizabeth DeryerIf a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn.
If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight.
If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy.
If a child lives with shame, he learns to feel guilty.
If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient.
If a child lives with encouragement, he learns confidence.
If a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate.
If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice.
If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith.
If a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself.
If a child lives with acceptance and friendship, he learns to find love in the world.
We have said that children must honor their parents as the natural and therefore the closest representatives of God. I should consider it unreasonable and dangerous to invert this proposition and to say that parents should feel and act toward their children as God’s representatives. Karl Barth, Church Dogmatics, Vol. III, Part 4
(These great pictures by our new Summit friend Kimberly Naranjo at Evolve Photography Studios here in RDU!)
In case you haven't figured out, the Summit Church offices have been AWOL this week. We were having some major internet server adjustments that required us to take the whole site down. And, to boot, we had to move our phone system.
Be patient, it will all be back up shortly. Hopefully this afternoon.
Between that and the flu this week, I've not been able to mind the blog as I would want. Thanks for you patience, if you've given it to me. If you're angry, then may 1000 pop-up ads make their way through your spam filter to teach you patience.
But, since I get sympathy from you for being sick, hopefully you can indulge a few shots of my wife and girls. These are from a new friend Kimberly Naranjo at the church. She has an absolutely incredible story about how Jesus saved her, and an amazing photography business/ministry called "evolve studios." These are from her blog.
Don't forget we start The Great Experiment this Sunday. One month where we as a church covenant to "test God" together... to see if God (Malachi 3:10) and see if He won't bless us and take care of us when we put Him first. This is not primarily about money, it is about our trust in God and our putting Him first. If you've never done so, I'm asking you in this one month to try it... take God at His word and give Him a chance to demonstrate His goodness to you!
Before my rant about the church being a family... Speaking of families... my wife finally bought the dreaded mini-van
this week. She is mortally depressed. In her days at UVA she and her
other "sisters" vowed they would never drive the hated bourgeoise
machinery. But I told her that what makes her weird in this culture is
not that she drives the van, but that she has three kids. If you're
going to be weird and have three kids, you might as well drive in
comfort. Plus, Peyton Manning told us it was OK.
And this van is sweet. 2 DVD screens... back-up camera... 5 sunroofs... stadium seating... can seat 212 people. It's nicer than our church auditorium. I'm thinking of making it our 3rd campus. It also has flames painted down the side.
If you see Veronica, tell her she's still smoking- hot, even as a 30 year old in a mini-van (if you're a girl... if you're a boy, just ogle at her but don't say anything).
Do I drive the van? Not on your life. The only way I'd drive a van
is if it looks like the A-Team fan. B.A. Baracus made that thing studly.
Not enough gets said about the role the church plays as an extended FAMILY. One of the major "end games" of the church (John 17) is friendship. Jesus asked that the church be one in ways similar to the Trinity is one. Jesus did not die to create an audience of faithful religious observers, but a truly organic family. A community of friends. And this is really important to me, because Jesus did not call me to gather an audience of religiously interested people, but to lead and build a church. Gathering the audience is only the first step of church, not the endgame. Our goal is disciples--empowered family members--not quickly-responding-and-just-as-quickly-fading-converts. A lot of the church growth material out there ought to be called "How to Fill Your Church with Tares."
And by "church," I mean "local church." Sure, there is one sense in which the "church" is the universal church of all Christ-followers of all times. But I can't be (in a number of ways) one with all believers everywhere... especially when you consider the "throughout the ages" aspect. (I can't have fellowship with dead people, after all, even if they are alive in heaven.) Church, quite often in the Bible, refers to the local, covenanted body of believers... a local church, like "the Summit Church."
How do you do that in a megachurch? I don't know. I'm trying to figure it out. It's hard, but Jerusalem did it. They had a megachurch and lived in community. I've written more about that here. You can't just throw up your hands and say "We can't do that in a big church, so we'll either choose between a New Testament church or seeing lots of people saved." I refuse to settle for that answer. I want to reach lots of people and see them in a genuine community.
All this to say, believers should be belongers. Not spectators. If your idea of "church" is a great show on Sundays, the Summit is not for you. We want you to be in a Summit Life group. We want you to be discovering and using your ministry passion in the church and in the community.
We want you to know and be known. And you can't do that with 2500 people. It starts with a group of 10, a SUMMIT LIFE GROUP.
What I love most about the church is the family aspect.
Even if the Summit Church kicked me out as their pastor here, I'd want to be here to raise my kids and live my life as a part of this community.
At 4:15 on Sunday morning, my wife woke me up to tell me that she was having some minor contractions
. Based on our past two children, I figured that that meant that in about 8 hours she'd go into labor, and about 8 hours after that, she'd give birth. I even thought I'd probably still be preaching at our church that morning with plenty of time to take her to the hospital, maybe even catch a flick before...
At 4:45 the contractions were coming, still light, about 3 minutes apart. No big deal...we called the doctor and she said to come on in. Veronica and I got up, took showers, packed bags, meandered about, etc, and started the 10 minute drive to the hospital.
Somewhere during that drive she went into "hard labor." By the time I got her in the emergency room, she was yelling like some kind of Irish thug at a soccer game. They threw her, literally, onto a bed, and 10 minutes later I was holding my baby. The hospital recorded us c
hecking in at 5:45, I was holding my baby at 5:55. No drugs. No epidural. My wife is a stud.
The doctor at the end of the bed looked more to me like a quarterback lining up in shotgun formation, doing that leg lift thing to signal the snap, than she did an actual doctor. My wife helped further this image by actually hiking the baby to her...
6 lbs, 8 oz. Her name is "Ryah," which means "rejoice" in Indonesian. (Indonesian spelling is 'raya', but pronounced 'ryah'.) Brown hair. (where did that come from?)
Extremely pretty, I think. Looks like me.
Praise God for my precious new little girl. I love being a daddy. Below is my mom and Ryah's two older sisters, Kharis and Alethia. More pictures here .
Below is a conversation a missionary friend serving in our Central Asian target area had with his 4 year old son yesterday after he was not very nice to his 23 year old Central Asian babysitter, who is a believer.
My friend: Son, did you know Y*** Z*** knows Jesus and follows Him like we do?
4 year old: Does she like Carolina?
My friend: I don't think so, son. I don't think she knows about Carolina.
4 year old son: Can we tell her about Carolina?
My friend's comment: I guess this is the next step in the salvation process. What have I taught my son????
Here is the latest installment of outrageous and somewhat humorous things my 4 year old daughter has said recently:
(1) The other day we caught some deer running through the woods behind our house. Kharis: "Wow, mom, look at the deer." Veronica: "Yeah... we rarely see them in the day! Usually they come out at night, because they are nocturnal." Kharis: silence. (Why my wife used the word 'nocturnal' with a 4 year old I wasn't quite sure of. Kharis said nothing and the conversation was over.) Three days later: Kharis: "Mommy, can I feel the new baby in your tummy?" She places her hand on Veronica's belly... 3 seconds pass... "I can't feel the baby moving." Veronica: "The baby doesn't really start moving around until nighttime." Kharis: "Why... Is she nocturnal?"
(2) This morning I was taking Kharis to school and I almost missed the exit. I had to slow down pretty dramatically and change lanes to make the turn. Kharis: "Whoa, Dad... you better slow down or we'll have to pay a lot money." Me: "Why's that, sweetheart?" Kharis: "Because we'll get a ticket and then we'll go to hell." ????? So what are they teaching them at this school? :)
(3) I try to read my Bible at home in the morning so that my girls can get used to seeing their Daddy spend time with God. The other morning, Kharis woke up and came down and sat beside me as I was reading. She rubbed her eyes for a few minutes, then said, “I want to read my Bible and talk to God too.” (I have tried to teach her that we pray while we read the Bible.) She ran upstairs and got her picture Bible. She flipped through the pages until she found a picture that she recognized, which happened to be of Pharoah and Moses. She bowed her head and said out loud, "Jesus, please help Pharaoh to not be mean and selfish.” I said, “That’s great, honey… but we're not supposed to pray for the people in the Bible, because they're dead. We are supposed to learn from the people in the Bible and pray about ourselves. We should ask Jesus to help us not to be mean and selfish. The Bible was written to help us to change.” She thought for a moment and said, “We should pray for Allie (2 year old sister). She’s mean and selfish like Pharoah."
So, no secret, I love being a dad. Here are 4 short conversations my 4 year old daughter Kharis has had with Veronica and me of recent:
Runner Up #3: To a 5 Year old boy she has befriended :( at the pool: "Johnny, I want you to meet my friend, Pastor J.D. He's my dad."
Runner Up #2: To Veronica, on why she didn't want to play outside in the sandbox: "I don't want to get sunburned on my luscious bod." (Seriously... no idea where she heard that one).
Runner Up #1: To me, cheering me on while I was working out: "Go Dad Go Dad Go Dad Go... Go Dad Go Dad Go Dad Go... Go Dad Go Dad Go Dad Go... Keep it going, big boy." (?)
Honorable mention: That my youngest, Alethia (2) can immediately complete the sentence "My Dad is..." with a loud, confident "Osssssum." (Awesome).
Top line: After me reading the story of Lazarus to Kharis from the Bible, Kharis asks, "What happens to people when they die?" I say, "If they believe in Jesus, they go to be with Him." Her response... "I believe in Jesus... (then a look of concern passes over her face)... I think Allie might too." That's my girl and future evangelist. Be concerned whether your little sister knows Christ.
OK, so forgive me for being a little sentimental. I'm painfully aware of how parents annoy the fooey out of everyone by thinking everyone thinks their kids are as cute as they themselves do.
