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Week of Hope:: What is Lacking

Guest Blog: Mike McDaniel, Ministry Assistant

With the Week of Hope just around the corner, I want to suggest that there’s ONE thing that we’re still missing from having an amazing week. And it’s a big one.

At the end of the second chapter of his letter to the Philippians, Paul writes:
I have thought it necessary to send to you Epaphroditus my brother and fellow worker and fellow soldier, and your messenger and minister to my need… So receive him in the Lord with all joy, and honor such men, for he nearly died for the work of Christ, risking his life to complete what was lacking in your service to me. (Phil 2:25, 29-30)

What strikes me about this passage is the phrase “complete what was lacking in your service to me.” Here’s the context: Paul is in jail – again. But this time, God doesn’t conjure up an earthquake to bust him out. At this point, Paul has been imprisoned 3-4 years, the last two under house arrest. But this is no pansy, Club Fed, white-collar setup.  Prisoners under house arrest were forced to pay for their own lodging – not too bad if you’re rich, but a meager existence for someone like Paul who was flat broke.

Fortunately, the Philippians came to Paul’s rescue in at least two ways. First, they prayed for him (1:19). They probably held prayer vigils; mobilized the church prayer chain. Second, they took up an offering. Philippians 4:18 tells us that they collected gifts to send to Paul. It doesn’t tell us what they sent, but I’m guessing it was probably the essentials – food, rent money, maybe some pens and paper. The point is – the Philippians sacrificed their time and money to provide for Paul.

So what does Paul mean when he says that something was lacking in their service to him? Is Paul just being ungrateful? Thanks for the gifts; you came up a little short, but fortunately your boy Epaph came through for you. No, what Paul means is this – the only thing that was lacking in their service was a personal presentation of that service to Paul. That’s what exactly Epaph did – he put himself on the line to deliver their prayers, their gifts, and their care to Paul. You can tell somebody that you care about them. You can even send them gifts. But it’s a whole other thing to stand by somebody when they’re in a rough spot.

The Week of Hope is next week. You have shown your care and generosity. You’ve prayed. You’ve given money. But now it’s time to complete what is lacking, to get out there and show the people of Durham the love of Jesus. We still need lots of volunteers to make this happen, especially in our public school projects and in all our church-wide projects on Fri and Sat afternoons. Click here to sign-up.

One last thing – this isn’t the only place Paul uses the phrase “complete what is lacking.” In Colossians, Paul writes that HIS suffering on their behalf completes what is lacking in the suffering of Christ. What Paul is saying is this – his suffering for the Colossians provides a personal presentation of Christ’s suffering on their behalf. In other words, when he sacrifices for Christ, they get a glimpse of the Gospel. That’s what’s so amazing about projects like the Week of Hope - through them, people get to see the Gospel. So let's get out there Summit Church, and show people the beauty and power of the Gospel!

Guest Post :: Organic Love and $100

Matt M. works in the Community & Church Planting ministry with Hope For Durham.  His last name has been abbreviated for security purposes since he and his wife will be moving to Central Asia in the fall to join one of our international church planting teams.

Remember back in January when Pastor J.D. preached through the Organic series?  As a church we studied John 15, learning about the kind of change that the Gospel produces:  not a superficial change to a person's religious exterior, but a complete change that occurs from the inside out.  We called this kind of change "organic"…partly because it sounds really cool and trendy, but mostly because it's an accurate description of the concept in John 15.

Not too long ago, I was reading through 1 John 4, and this verse really jumped out at me: "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God – everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God."   John is explaining that love for one another – including love for the poor and the lost in our community – is a result of the organic kind of change that Jesus described in John 15!  Jesus had hinted at this in John 15:12, but I didn't quite catch it until reading 1 John.   This means that if our church is full of organically changed people, a love that demonstrates Christ around us will naturally spill out on the city around us.  It also means that the love will come from the heart of our church – from the small groups and the family groups.  We don't want "trickle-down" love resulting from a bunch of programs designed to put people through the motions - we want organic love!  

Our Hope For Durham team felt that this new realization required a new approach: this year, rather than simply orchestrating programs and asking church members to sign up, we want to empower the heart of our church to release the hope of Jesus into Durham and the RDU area.  Small groups and families, I'm talking about you!  Following Jesus' example in John 15:8, we want to equip you to be fruitful ministers so that God will get the glory.

Of course, this doesn't mean that we won't plan any large-scale projects; there are some great ways we can love our community that can only happen when we get 200 people to work together.  But it does mean that we are going to set aside a couple of days during the week of hope during which we will ask every small group to plan their own project to bless the community.  As one way of equipping you to do this, we are providing resources for your group at www.hopefordurham.com that includes project ideas and contact information for our ministry partners in the community.  We've also made available a small group study titled "The Servant Church", which will lead you through the biblical call to mercy ministry and what that looks like in the life of a Christ follower.

And we’re  giving you money.  Yes, you read that right: the church is giving each SummitLIFE group $100 to use in loving our city.  Think of it as seed money that will allow your group to be creative and entrepreneurial in the way that you serve.  Your group could decide that you want to buy $100 worth of food to cook a dinner for a rescue mission, or you might decide that you want to match the funds with your own money so that you can take it to a local gas station and offer to buy down the cost of gasoline 25 cents per gallon.  The type of project you choose isn’t as important as finding a way to express the love of Christ…the kind of love that comes from an organically changed heart.

My Verbal Gaffe and Helping Other People

Let me first address a misleading statement I made through video at the Brier Creek campus this past Sunday. I was explaining why we were committed to planting other churches in the RDU area as well as multi-site venues. My statement, as it came out, was "We don't want to just be the biggest church in the area, we want to church the area." Read a certain way, that could imply that part of our vision is to be "the biggest church in the area." But being "bigger" than other Gospel-preaching churches has never been, nor will ever be, part of our strategy. What I was trying to say was that being big as a church was NOT our goal, but rather seeing every person in RDU get into a church was a goal. In many ways, we'd love to be the SMALLEST church in the area! If in the process we grow big ourselves then so be it, but our focused goal is not to be a big church in the city but seeing the glory of God come to our city. In case you were confused by that statement, sorry for the poor communication.

Now, here's the main point of this post: There are a number of you for whom this Saturday could be one of the most important ministry skill development opportunities of your life.

• Some of you have a passion to see others around you--children, neighbors, co-workers, small group members--grow strong spiritually.
• Some of you have found that people tend to bring you their problems.
• Some of you would love to know how to speak helpfully into the marriages and families of your children or your siblings.

You should recognize that these things are most likely indications of a spiritual gift (1 Peter 4:10) that God has given you--a way that he will make Himself known through you. It is your responsibility to nurture and grow that gift so that it can be effective. Other people's spiritual lives literally depend on it.

This Saturday we are having the smartest counselor I know, my friend Dr. Sam Williams, come in to do a special 1-morning, 3 hour "training" on how to help people with their problems. Dr. Williams has been a huge help to my own marriage, and has helped me as much as anyone to know how to approach the "problems" in the lives of people I love. This event is open to ALL.

It would be a shame to miss it. You will better understand people, the Gospel, and how to be a more effective minister as a result of it. I promise.

This is part of the core vision of our church: we don't want to simply gather a crowd to benefit from the ministry skills of the pastor, but empower you in your own giftings. Our small group leaders, deacons, and elders will be there. Hope YOU will be TOO.

Question and Answer 4

Here's a great question from someone at our Cole Mill campus, answered by Pastor Rick:

I really like the multi-site concept. Are we going to launch any new locations in the next few years?

This is one of my favorite questions. YES! We have set a goal to start at least one new campus by the fall of 2009. We’ve also put together a team that will be studying, praying and planning to make that happen. I hope we can start even more than that by then. This could be a great way to expand the kingdom here in the Triangle in the coming years. Three things we need to start a new campus: a Place (facility to meet in); a People (who are coming to one of other campuses from a good distance and would make a good start-up core group); and a Pastor (someone who can lead the new congregation). Of course, a little start up funding, too. Where will our next one be? Mebane? Chapel Hill? Fuquay-Varina? North Raleigh?

We think that the best "Gospel strategy" for an area includes preaching the message of the Gospel to every person in that area, and demonstrating the Gospel (by acts of love and service) to that area. The best way to do both of those things, we believe, is to plant local churches and congregations. If you'd like to check out a little more about our "multi-site" philosophy, here are a couple of helpful articles. 1 2

Date Night, Baby

I've got to tell you how great it's been to hear some of the stories you've told me about what the "date your mate" challenge has been to your marriage. For those of you that don't know, we challenged married couples to go on a date night once each week during this series. This past Friday we (the pastoral team) tried to show you how serious we were about it by keeping everybody's kids and giving $20 and a date night plan to couples. We also rotated through a prayer room lifting up each of the couples that were out on their date that evening.

We gave out a ton of money and were flat overrun with kids. It was awesome.

Here is a note I got from one of our more colorful members that you just have to read. Worth your time, I promise:

I need to tell you what a ridiculous blessing date night was to me and my husband. Let me explain: I have an exemplary and amazing husband. He basically does everything right, from telling me I'm beautiful to bringing me flowers for no reason. Nonetheless, since the birth of our last child, I have basically been teetering on the edge of a wild depression spiral/panic attack/wild cookie dough-eating spree, or all of the above. You see, I'm a stay at home mom of what at times feels like an actual gaggle of children (whom are precious and delightful in the Lord's eyes, thank you very much), and lately that role has essentially consumed me. I sometimes feel like I am beginning to disappear, that I no longer exist as an individual, but simply as a caretaker, sippy cup distributor, and CEO of our household chores division: and forget about feeling romantic or physically becoming. HA! There are days that I don't even get to brush my teeth, let alone shower or even change out of my pajamas, so even though my man and I love each other madly, there is just no room for a spark (unless you're really into sweatpants or teeth with sweaters on them).

Friday night was the first time in almost a year that I have really felt alive. Truly.

I got dressed up for the first time since I can remember and even showered...SHOCKER! I put on his favorite perfume. My teeth were perfectly matched; not one was missing. My husband could IMMEDIATELY sense the difference.  I don't know if it was the fact that we were able to go a restaurant that was a little nicer than we ones we usually frequent (hello, $20 bill!), or that we had such a large block of time (and such fantastic babysitters!) and didn't have to rush back to the kids, but we were just giddy the whole night. It felt like the night was just for us, and I have to say I didn't think about the kids once (is that bad? sue me.). We talked and talked and talked, and not just the typical "how was your day" nonsense...my husband told me things he had never told me before, and vice versa. It may have been that I was just truly listening for the first time in a while. It was oddly reminiscent of our first few dates. My husband noted that he could literally feel the prayers of the pastors back at the Brier Creek campus pouring over our conversation and interaction with each other.

Honestly, the night was HOT!  At one point, my husband actually leaned over and nuzzled against my neck, remarking how good I smelled. He was gazing at me, and by gazing, I mean staring and drooling. I felt attractive and worthwhile. I didn't pity my husband for having to deal with me, my fatigue, or my weirdo body issues. I found him WILDLY attractive, and honestly, that sparked my recently nonexistent libido. He enjoyed this, needless to say. We kissed in the restaurant, and then again in the car. We were essentially all over each other, and that was such a refreshing change from our recent state of affairs. I am proud to say that I am totally hot for my husband, even after all these years, and that makes me proud...we answered all the questions on the questionaire, and it really helped us focus on what we have, which is so valuable and so precious, and also on what we like it to become. We have been gifted with each other, and are newly determined to cherish and protect that gift. We have a game plan in place. We each know where the other stands, so no more guess work, which means a lot less frustration and needless bickering. I am just so thankful that the Summit Church prizes its members and their marriages in such a way. We were so deeply blessed by Date Night....when is the next one?

We have only a couple of weeks left in the Exposed: Song of Solomon series. What questions do you really hope Solomon addresses?

Sex sells

OK, so people usually think of sex and the church about like they think of...exactly. We don't usually think of them together at all. As I heard a pastor say recently, Growing up it seemed like you could summarize my church's attitude toward sex in one word: NO! And after you got married, the "NO" changed to a "yes, but," the "but" being "but don't talk about it."

Here are some interesting tidbits from church history on the subject:

• It was said that early church father Tertullian would rather see the extinction of the human race than enjoy the evils of sexual pleasure;
• Origen (3rd century) thought it was so evil that he castrated himself with a knife;
• Gregory of Nyssa (4th century) thought that Adam and Eve in their perfect state were created without sexual desire, and if they had not fallen into sin, they would have been able to reproduce themselves in a “harmless mode of vegetation”;
• Jerome (around 420) – whenever he experienced sexual desire for a woman, he adopted this spiritual practice of throwing himself into thorn bushes to overwhelm himself with physical pain;
• From the 6th century onward priests in the Roman church were forbidden to marry; the church began to limit the days when sex was permissible – they eliminated half of the year;
• Martin Luther (1500's) declared “intercourse is never without sin,” and “God mercifully excuses it by his grace."

But at the Summit, we're going to talk about it :) this Sunday, and probably the next, as part of our Song of Solomon series.

As noted, these messages will be PG-13, so you may want to think twice about having your kids in the service. However, parents... by the time your kid graduates high school he or she will have seen close to 14,000 references to sex on TV alone. Your kid has heard about it. Perhaps they should hear about it properly? If you choose to send them to our kids or middle school programming this Sunday, maybe watch the video on our website later with them and talk through it. Planned Parenthood released a study recently that showed that of all the girls who come in for abortions, less than 5% of their parents ever had a candid conversation about sex.

Now, as you know, SEX SELLS, even at church, it seems. We have had a lot of new people coming to the church. LAST WEEK many of you, per our request, came to the 9:00 Brier Creek service. Thank you... it totally worked. We had equal distribution of people at 9:00 and 10:45 at the BC campus. If we would have had the normal distribution, we would never have been able to fit everyone in. SO, I NEED YOU TO DO IT AGAIN. Please, if you can, come to the 9:00 service!

Monday Open Forum

As I told you, I wanted this blog to be a type of open forum for the several weeks we are doing this Exposed Series on Song of Solomon. (To note, we have easy access to the video feed--including all bumper and illustration videos, like Dumb and Dumber, audio copies of the sermons, and follow up questions here... p.s. this stuff is usually added sometime Monday).

I got a lot of good stuff from you last week, and I read every word of it. In fact, some of you may have heard me incorporate your material into the message without giving you credit :).

So, what questions or comments do you have? One of our bloggers, Sharon Hodde posted some good reflections as a single girl here. Post your thoughts in the comments below.

I have issued to you the "date night challenge": each week for the series go out on a date with your spouse and discuss what we are talking about or the questions I gave to you. Some of you may say, "We don't have the money to do that." Fair statement. Guys, simply planning a dinner at home where you do the cooking... with candles and all the froo froo stuff can be an economical way to do it. If you have kids, wait till the kids go down and then do something special for her. Or go for a walk in Duke Gardens. Whatever... just be in a place where you can focus on each other. That is the point. Now, for some of you guys, the reason you don't want to spend the money on your wife is because you don't value the relationship enough to sacrifice financially for it anymore. And that, of course, is part of the problem. Your wife can see that, by the way. Guys, we spend money at work to maintain the health of our organizations (perks for employees, training, etc). Why would we not spend that type of money also on our marriages? Veronica and I have written into our budget money we use for childcare and dating each other. Some of you guys just need to man up and blow some money on your "most valuable asset."

Any ideas for a creative date? What is the best, most creative "date" you have been on? Post below if you have something good to share.

The questions from Sunday I asked you to talk about on your date were:

• Him to her: Do you feel like I really listen to you?
• Her to him: Do you feel like I respect and follow your leadership?

For our young pro's (unmarried people in their 20's), they've got a great event on Thursday at the Brier Creek campus in "the Bay" area. Details here.

Here are a couple of great books I am recommending (click the link to order them). The Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas and His Needs, Her Needs by Gary Thomas. These books should be read together. His Needs, Her Needs is a very practical book, but doesn't properly put the marriage question in the context of our relationship with God, and marriage really needs to be grounded in Christ. Sacred Marriage shows how our relationships really only grow healthy in Christ. For whatever it's worth, Sacred Marriage gave my marriage even more practical, marriage-saving advice than His Needs, Her Needs.

Exposed, Open-Sourced

NOTHING offers as much hope for the future as the prospect of romance. At the same time, there are few things that cause as much anxiety and fear as love gone wrong.

That's why we're delving into a systematic, chapter by chapter study of the Bible's book of Romance, written by the wisest and dumbest man who ever lived: the Song of Solomon.

This week, in chapter 1, we'll look at "the Laws of Attraction." What should we really be looking for in romance? What should we avoid? What should we do when we find it?

I'd love for this blog to be a kind of "open forum" for the next few weeks, wherein you have a chance to give feedback and ask questions. Once a week in a blog post I'll either review what we studied or preview what's coming and you can give me your feedback in the comments section. I promise to read them.

On Sunday, we'll have a lot of resources (books and stuff) you can use to study along with me yourself. Many of our Summit Life Groups will be doing a companion study along with me for these 6-7 weeks.

We'll have homework. Some of it will be fun.

If this subject causes a lot of angst within you, I understand. Regardless of your current status or your past mistakes, I promise that you will find something redemptive and instructive in the book of Song of Solomon for you.

And remember, for people not yet convinced of the claims of Christ, romance can be a powerful clue to the existence of God. I've always been moved by the words of Ernest Becker, the atheist who wrote The Denial of Death. He said:

We still need to feel that our life matters in the scheme of things. We still want to merge our selves with some higher self-absorbing meaning in trust and in gratitude. But if we no longer have God, how are we to do this? One of the first ways that occurred to the modern person was the romantic solution. The self-glorification that we need in our innermost being, we now look for in the love partner. The love partner becomes the divine ideal within which to fulfill one's life. Spiritual and moral needs now become focused on one individual.

What is it that we want when we elevate the love partner to this position? We want to be rid of our faults. We want to be rid of our feeling of nothingness. We want to be justified. We want to know that our existence hasn't been in vain. We want redemption, nothing less… In case we are inclined to forget how deified the romantic love object is, the popular songs continually remind us. . . But no human relationship can bear (this) burden of godhood... If your partner is your 'ALL' then any shortcoming in him becomes a major threat to you.

Perhaps you know someone that is asking the questions that a study like this can answer. For you Summit members, I'm praying that you and I can use this series to introduce people to the awesome, satisfying, redemptive love of Christ.

Easter... Exposed

Well, praise God for answering a lot of prayers on Easter. I saw so many people with guests with them, and many of you have told me how God used the weekend in their lives. And yes, we had people there who came just because of the T-shirts and inviter cards... one guy came up to me after the service on Saturday night--he had received Christ that evening, and he told me that just that afternoon he'd seen somebody in Caribou Coffee with our T-shirt who invited him to come. Awesome. Sometimes people are just one invitation away from eternity.

I don't have all the exact numbers from Easter yet, but we had well, well over 3000 in attendance for the Saturday/Sunday services, and it looks like we had a lot of people turn in cards saying they were trusting Christ. Here's a story a Raleigh News and Observer reporter who was at the service Sunday ran in today's paper.

If you're a Summit member, stop and thank God for that. We can never take it for granted. We don't deserve any of it.

This coming weekend starts the Exposed series, a journey through Song of Solomon looking at what the Bible has to say about sex, love, dating and romance in general. Should be spicy.

I want to be the smallest church in our area

The other morning I was reading my Bible before I came into work and came to the passage in Numbers 11 where Joshua gets jealous for Moses' sake because there are a couple of other prophets running around in Israel's camp giving words from God. Moses' response is, "Are you jealous for my sake? I wish ALL of God's people were prophets!" (11:29-30)

I wish that there were 20 churches of 2000 or more in the Brier Creek area alone. Even if there were that many, we still wouldn't have reached all the people that live in this area.

There are 1.6 million people in Raleigh and grows by 7% a year. Even if our church grew by 15,000 next year, we would not have kept up with just the GROWTH percentage of RDU.

I pray that God blesses and grows our church, yes. I also pray that he blesses other churches preaching the same message. For however big we'll get, it would always be better if there were more and bigger churches around us. More and growing churches mean more people finding Jesus. We don't want to commit the sin of idolatry by being jealous of someone else's growth. To paraphrase Moses, "Don't be jealous for our sake, I wish that all God's churches were thriving and growing!"

If my church doubles next year, that would be great. But why shouldn't I also want the church down the road to grow 4x that fast? Wouldn't that mean more people coming to Jesus? For my brother pastors, if you don't desire other churches to grow and even surpass yours, it may be good to do a heart check. As I've heard, there is such a fine but distinct line between "my kingdom come" and "thy kingdom come."

The stakes are too high for church leaders to be consumed with petty territorial jealousy. Heaven and hell are real, and faith in Jesus' blood is the only the thing that makes the difference between those two. I don't have time or energy to compete with other churches. We've got one shot at making Jesus famous in our generation.

Our pastoral team has been praying for all the Gospel-teaching churches in the RDU area that they would see something this Easter that would blow their minds. We pray that God would grip RDU with the Gospel and turn this place upside down. We're glad to be a part of that team.